In case you haven't heard, JUSTIN MORNEAU WON THE HOMERUN DERBY!!!!!! I'm dying because I could barely breathe, I couldn't mess up his karma.
WARNING, THIS IS SLIGHTLY GROSS. IF YOU DON'T LIKE BLOOD, SKIP THE PARTS IN RED.
So my day started off like this:
Can't get out of the driveway because of road construction.
Get to work, find a HUGE to do list in my cubby.
Feel like I'm going to puke, but I have to take a bunch of dead, smelly birds out of the freezer to thaw, then cut up a rat for the owl.
Break up an owl/turkey fight.
Save the poor Blanding's turtle from death again.
Wash, blowdry, and pin up said dead, smelly, now thawed birds.
Take a bunch of deer, beaver, and other assorted skulls outside and put them in a box for beatles to eat. They were bleeding on the floor. I kind of decided that six more weeks might be a bit much.
I got home, yelled at some people for almost getting into a car accident in my driveway, and then finally my day improved.
The homerun derby.
- Josh Hamilton hit 28 homeruns in the first round. I thought his pitcher was going to die before it was over.
- Justin hit 8 in his first round
- I was bored by the time the Hamilton dude who used to smoke meth or something was done. I guess he's clean now? I have to say, I wasn't listening.
- Some other people bat. I text/IM people madly updating them.
- The dude who looks like Bill Guerin fails.
- Justin Morneau proceeds to hit 9 more homeruns, Bill Guerin look alike who plays for the Brewers goes off to cry in the dugout.
- Joe Morgan is convinced that you must have 7 homeruns to win the competition.
- Justin Morneau proceeds to hit 5 homeruns. That's not good enough for Joe Morgan.
- I yell at one of my friends for killing Justin's karma.
- Josh Hamilton makes me almost die, but he only hits three homeruns.
- I run around yelling like I don't know what. My mom kind of looks at me like I've lost my mind. I did it! I didn't jinx him! Then he gets to help some little girl, and several people say his name wrong, some random dude calls him Jason, and the interviewer lady says his last name incorrectly. I feel for you, dude. Apparently Kirsten is a hard name to pronounce too.
Now I'm tired from running around like a nut and being happy. I'll go back to pinning birds to a board, but with a smile on my face. At least for 10 minutes, until I have to break up another angry bird fight. If I didn't have to wear the smirf shirt tomorrow, I'd be wearing a Justin Morneau one. *sigh* Too bad my boss would not accept his winning as a proper excuse. I'll just be sitting down in the dungeon all day dealing with dead birds that have been frozen as long as I've been alive, but she's not known for being nice/accommodating/helpful.
5 comments:
Somewhere on this blog, someone must have asked you what you do for a living. But I can't be trusted with the internet tonight, and therefore, should not search for it. I would guess that our jobs are in different worlds, but equally strange, so I will ask:
What the hell do you do for a living?
I don't know if anyone has ever asked, but I work for the Three Rivers Park District, which is basically the county park system for the county I live in, kind of like a smaller version of the DNR. I work at a nature center and teach children about nature. Part of this involves doing all the crappy and horrible work around. The other part of it involves working with a lot of kids and all the ridiculousness that comes with it. I'm an intern, so I'm not paid, and I have NO seniority.
What do you do for a living that could match breaking up and owl and turkey fight?
I hate to kill your Morneau karma happiness but that shirt is still in the wash.
And be thankful, the kid with the incontinence issues isn't coming this week at least.
Yayayay Morneau! He did such an awesome job...and gave us some good karma for some pretty darn good games on the Wild schedule that was released that week, too! I can't wait for the Senators game!!
Morneau is ON FIRE lately. Not only that, he's gotten chattier the longer he's been in the league.
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