Tuesday, January 1, 2008

The Minnesota Wild New Year's Resolutions

The Minnesota Wild will hopefully make some New Year's Resolutions, and these are the ones that I've chosen for them.

Mark Parrish-get a haircut, the long hair is not working for you, my friend.

Matt Foy-Get a better/less annoying girlfriend. (long story)

Pierre-Marc Bouchard-find a way to grow some more hair. Stephane Veilleux has pledged to join him in this quest.

Petteri Nummelin-learn how to score during regulation play.

Josh Harding-pick up some crazy goalie habit so that he can become more like Backstrom, and he'll hopefully get rid of his plaid shorts and striped shirts (typically worn together).

Brian Rolston- will learn how to stand around/be interviewed/play hockey with his mouth closed.

Mikko Koivu-learn ancient healing methods to apply to himself.

Derek Boogaard-learn Jedi powers to use on the refs. "That was not a penalty...he punched himself."

Martin Skoula-Learn how to play hockey properly, and stop helping the other team!

I don't really have any New Year's resolutions for myself, but I suppose one of them should be to take care of this wrist thing once and for all.


elise said...

ha I somehow missed this one when you actually wrote it (I'm not positive how) but it's great! Parrish needs to start wearing his mouthguard IN his mouth...it's always sticking out. and Johnsson sticks his tongue out whenever he has the puck...but that's kind of funny. Now I want to know the Foy's girlfriend story!

valerie said...

LOL. I know this is old but my boyfriend met this girl from canada "claming" to be foy's gf right around New Years. He came home and said he thinks he knows why jacques doesn't play Foy...he must have met his annyoing, snotty, bitchy girlfriend. He said Matt Foy girlfriend was the most annoying and rather unattractive girl ever. Terrible bleached hair, and a huge nose and just loud and obnoxious, rolled her eyes and shot dirty looks at everyone around her. We've met lots of the girlfriends fiancees b/c our seats are in 120 right by the players wives section and they are generally so nice. Rolston's wife, Shultz's wife, Foster's fiancee etc...nice and cute girls. But, this girl was just a B**ch I guess.