I have come to you in my hour of need. If necessary, I will lay out the proper sacrifices like the Untypical Girls outlined, but I don't have time tonight. The things I would like from you are simple things indeed, and I will give you a whole list to choose from, but I would be happy with just one of them.
-Please make Chris Simon go away
-let the Wild score goals. Lots of them.
-Help us regain our division lead
-If not the division lead, I'd settle for making the playoffs
-Don't make us play Anaheim in the playoffs, even if Sleek says we are due to win
-Make Jarome Iginla get some embarassing injury before we play them next.
-Let Forsberg screw up the Avs chemistry so they are not as good as I fear they will be.
Thank you Baby Hockey Jesus for letting us keep Pierre Marc Bouchard, and thank you to the Untypical Girls for the inspiration for this post.
Feel free to add onto this list of things to ask Baby Hockey Jesus for, because I'm sure that no matter who you are a fan of right now, there is something about today that makes you unhappy. Unless you are a fan of the Penguins, and in which case, I hate you a little bit.
I'm too irritated about life to do a pre-game for the next game. We play Tampa Bay tomorrow. They no longer have Richards, they have half the Dallas Stars instead. Lecavalier plays for them. That is all.
***EDIT*** I got a mention on Deadspin, and not in a bad way! See it here http://deadspin.com/361314/maybe-pittsburgh-didnt-get-bitch+slapped-after-all
Thanks to Loser Domi for pointing it out!